This is actually chapter nine in the final edition of “Reawakened Flames.”
Reminder: My notes will be in italicized red font, and the text from E1 will be in black. E1 refers to edition one, and E2 refers to edition two.
8
“Princess Aria, are you awake?” a maid calls while standing in front of Aria’s bedroom door. “Princess?”
“What’s going on?” Jayce had heard her as he came around the corner.
The maid turns to him with a concerned expression on her face. “It’s just a little odd. The princess isn’t up yet. She’s usually eating her breakfast by now. I would send her father in, but he’s too sick to leave his bed.”
Before I had The Emotion Thesaurus, I described most of the emotions just by name and not by actions. That book helped so much.
[removed the part when Jayce finds the room empty because it is almost identical to E2]
The royal guards and the knights search the castle to no avail. Princess Aria is nowhere to be found, and no one has seen her. Her horse is accounted for, but two are missing. A headcount of castle staff reveals that Karl and Everett are also missing.
Jayce accompanies the captain of the royal guard, Vivian, to update the king on their progress. She may be a woman, but the captain with shoulder length blond hair runs a tight ship and keeps everyone under her command in line. Those closest to her also know about the strict and professional captain’s equally gentle and caring side.
I don’t like some of these lines, especially my original description of Vivian. The wording is also clunky. I didn’t know much about Vivian when I first wrote this, but she has a story about her past that will be told later.
The king’s bedroom is similar to Aria’s, but two wardrobes sit across from the bed on the opposite wall. One had been Amelia’s.
King Garne looks terrible. He is trying to sit up in bed, but his body seems to no longer want to support him judging by how far he is slumped down. His face is pale, and he suddenly seems years older and worn out.
He lets out a wracking cough into a handkerchief. Garne pulls the cloth away and sighs dismally before balling it up and setting it aside quickly. Jayce spots a flash of red as the handkerchief is hidden.
[removed a few paragraphs]
Jayce hands him the fabric piece.
Garne’s face falls with even more despair. “Yes, that’s hers.”
Another royal guard opens the door. “I’m sorry to interrupt. A phoenix named Landa just arrived. She said she must speak with King Garne at once.”
“Open the window, and let her in.”
This is when I originally had the rest of the chapter from Landa’s perspective.
Landa manages to find the open window with the help of someone waving to her. She settles herself on the window ledge.
“I am Landa, daughter of Landaro. I’m sorry if this is bad time.” She noticed when she came in that everyone looks stressed out and worried. The king also looks ill. “I bring grave news. You must prepare for war.”
“What?” Garne asks in shock.
“My father sent scouts out several days ago because of odd things happening in Drangon, Hanarthar, and Rochellor. He sent me to try to get closer and confirm what the scouts suspected. I flew as close as I dared and witnessed troops gathered in Rochellor and preparing to march out for war this morning. They are apparently being led by King Rodrick. My lord, you will soon have an invasion on your doorstep.”
The king looks crestfallen. One catastrophe after another is being piled on top of him. “I should have known Rodrick would do something like this. I’ve tried to keep peace with him, even after he wanted some of our lands. I never imagined he’d resort to brute force.”
The chapter is supposed to be from Landa’s perspective, but I head-hopped a few times.
“What would you have us do?” Vivian asks.
“Send word to our allies by carrier pigeons. We can’t fight off all three armies by ourselves.”
The pigeon thing was abandoned. I threw it in here with no thought to what the purpose would be.
“They have blockades set up,” Landa informs them. “They’ve cut your allies off from reaching you.”
This is the same issue with lack of world building. I didn’t know what the relationships between the kingdoms were at that time.
Garne leans forward with his elbows resting on his thighs and puts his hands against his face, feeling crushed by the weight of every misfortune occurring at once. In this position, the king looks too sick and frail to be the man who rode miles yesterday without hardly breaking a sweat.
That’s a very odd paragraph to be from Landa’s perspective. Oops.
After a few minutes, he looks back up with more determination and self-assurance in his expression. “Send riders out to warn the villages. If anyone can be spared to come here and fight, bring them. Keep a close eye on everyone in the castle. We don’t know who else might be working against us. Bring those two to me if you even find them. We need to know if they are involved in everything that’s happening.”
[removed a few lines]
“When did Princess Aria go missing?”
“Last night.” Garne’s expression changes to one of realization.
“While I was investigating the armies, I overheard two knights from Rochellor talking about a rumor in their kingdom that Rodrick was responsible for your wife’s death. I do wonder if their words were more than gossip.”
“I wouldn’t be surprised at this point that he’s behind everything. I’m having the same symptoms as Amelia, but I also have no proof. I don’t like Rodrick, but I can’t accuse the man of regicide based on rumors and suspicion. Karl and Everett are the ones who know the truth and undoubtedly poisoned my wife. I trusted them for three years, and this is what I get in return.” The king’s expression darkens with anger. Then, he coughs briefly and takes a breath. “I suspect that they are long gone by now though. They certainly knew what they were doing. A royal guard would know all the watches and a staff member would know the castle like the back of their hand. Both of them had access to our food and drinks. What would they do to Aria though? Why kidnap her if they wanted us both dead?”
“I think I might know,” Jayce says. He seems haunted by some awful memory.
“What is it?”
“I had a little sister. She had some issues similar to Aria. We visited a village by the southern forest. We weren’t even near that old sorcerer’s keep but…”
“She was taken by one of those dark creatures,” Landa finishes for him. “I’m sorry.”
Jayce nods, unable to speak.
“I’m sorry too,” Garne says sympathetically. “I can’t imagine how horrible it is to lose someone that way. I hope I won’t have to go through the same pain as well.”
Jayce gets a handle on his emotions and addresses the king again, “I know you’ve noticed Aria has been anxious and not acting like herself. The most dangerous place for a person like her would be the sorcerer’s keep or somewhere close.”
Garne nods in agreement, fear for his daughter rising up inside of him. “You understand I would jump on my horse right now and ride there but I can’t. I’m not even sure whether to send a group of knights since I don’t know how many of them might be traitors, and I need Vivian here. I do know I can trust you. You’ll do everything in your power to bring Aria back safe. Ride out immediately.”
“Yes, my lord.”
“Landa, are you required to report back to your father right now?”
“If you have crucial need of me, I can delay my report.”
“I’d like you to go with Jayce. Maybe your magic can help protect my daughter and who I predict will one day be my future son-in-law.” He frowns and adds sadly, “I guess that’s a future I won’t even see.”
“Maybe we can find some kind of antidote,” Jayce says.
“There is no cure. We couldn’t find one then, and I doubt we would find one in time now.” Garne’s voice is full of regret. “It’s over for me. Save my daughter while she still has a fighting chance.”
Landa wishes she could turn down the request. Only phoenix fire can kill the dark creatures that lurk in that dreaded region. Another phoenix would be more capable, but she is the only one here. Sending another phoenix to help will take a couple of days. That’s two days the princess cannot afford to lose. Landa just hopes her presence will be warding enough.
Landa’s thoughts here were just moved to their own chapter in E2.
“I’ll go with Jayce. We’ll bring your daughter back safe.”
“Thank you. Jayce, in case I don’t get the chance, tell Aria that I love her. Even if she has some issues with anxiety, she will still be a great queen of Toranon. I believe in her.”
“Yes, sir.”
Jayce hurries to pack, making a stop in Aria’s room to grab gear and clothes for her. He saddles the princess’ big black stallion, Storm, and his own little bay mare with a white stripe down her face, Bridgette. He and Landa are soon on their way out.
And of course, I added the extra scene in E2 of Jayce and Landa arriving at the edge of Lythannen here.
Copyright © 2018 Lindsay McCafferty